As an example of this work, Yedidah shares her story:
“It is true that everyone sees and interprets reality through the prism of his or her own experience and personality. That is as true of me as it is of you. So what I’m not going to do here is to write my own interpretation of Rabbi Ashlag’s work. Each person can see for himself or herself how their life is mirrored within the work of Rabbi Ashlag. Nevertheless, I realize that one day you may be holding this book in your hands wanting to come closer to the practical work of self-transformation but without the benefit of the living presence of a guide or a teacher, such as I have had. So I would like to share with you some practical steps that have helped me along the path at different times. I came to the work of Rabbi Ashlag at a time of intense inner conflict. On the surface my life looked fine. I was married with two boys and a good relationship with my husband. But underneath I was not happy. My thirst for a real connection with God through a living truth had never been satisfied.
     I was brought up in a religious Jewish household that outwardly conformed to the rules and regulations, but an inner sense of the intimacy of Torah had been missing. I sensed, even as a child, that there had to be something more – but it had eluded me. I grew up and became a Doctor of Medicine. I specialized in anesthesia and became especially attuned to people’s pain and their suffering. I learnt how to alleviate pain of different kinds, both physical and emotional. Yet I was never able to answer the question of why we suffer.
     I tried studying the Tanya, the classic work of the Chabad Chassidim and I felt that I was on the right track—but for me it still did not resonate. My inner distress continued within me, sometimes coming to the surface and at other times simply simmering underneath.
     A good and perceptive friend of mine who saw what lay beneath the surface and who was himself involved in the work of Rabbi Ashlag introduced me to this work. The note sounded. A chord had been struck. I knew that this material spoke to me in a way that no other material had.
     I started to study with my friend. Right from the start it was clear to me that this was no intellectual study. Used to learning, I nevertheless suddenly found myself unable to understand seemingly simple ideas. I found myself asking my friend again and again, “But what is the will to receive?” My difficulty did not lie in my inability to understand with my brain but, rather, in my inability to see that I also acted from a will to receive for myself alone.
     So my first exercise was simply to become an observer of myself. I began to try to see where I was acting from. What were the motives that lay behind my words and actions? This was hard for me. I had been so used to criticizing and judging myself and living up to high standards that simply asking myself the question, “Where am I acting from?” was not an easy task! What encouraged me was my knowledge, brought from the teaching of Rabbi Ashlag, that the ego is a necessary and precious part of God’s creation. It is the raw material for the transformed vessel that will one day receive God’s light. I no longer needed to judge myself or feel guilty. If I acted from my ego it was, after all, God who had placed the vessel within me! This helped relieve the difficult feelings of guilt and self-criticism with which I had always lived. The simple question, “Where am I acting from?” became more a matter of curiosity, interest and self-awareness. It was important at the beginning to ask this question without any hidden impulsion or compulsion to act differently; simply to grow in non-judgmental awareness.
     The months went by and I continued my studies. The yearly calendar with the High Holidays of Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur came around. They brought again the familiar hateful feelings of God sitting in judgement; sins, confession and repentance. I expressed my feelings to my friend. He looked at me in astonishment. “But God isn’t like that at all! That is a projection on God that people have made over the centuries.” I went back to the study of Rabbi Ashlag. My friend was right. I needed to correct my own inner image of God. I looked at the four stages of our perception of God’s Providence as described in the Introduction to the Study of the Ten Sephirot. It did not matter to me which stage I was at—the very notion that I could change my concept of God—that it was possible to change—felt like a gift, a miracle. Whatever notion of God I had cobbled together within me from my background, culture and life experience could change! I did not have to be bound by it. I could move on. With that gift of inner freedom, I took on the affirmation, “God is Good and does good.”
    It was not easy. I wanted more children and instead was suffering miscarriage after miscarriage. Sometimes I quarrelled with my husband. It was hard in those moments to say “God is Good and does good”, let alone believe it! Yet I persevered. I did so much want a better and deeper connection with God than I had had previously.
    After about a year of studying the material, I decided that it was time to look inside myself and see in what ways I had changed. How had this hard work, this study, changed me? I looked within and found that it had not made any difference at all. I was astonished! How could that be? Extremely hesitantly, I shared this experience with my friend. To my surprise, a smile slowly spread across his face. The learning, he explained, had all been in the nature of surrounding light, the light which shines upon the vessel, awakening it to the need to transform. Now I was beginning to discover the true lack within me, the true need to give, the true need to act differently, to change my responses and my way of being in the world. Only when the vessel itself senses its lack of light can the real work begin of changing the vessel and bringing it into affinity of form with the light.
     That moment was eight years ago.